As most of you know I am a single mother. To top that off, I am the only parent my girls really know. Sure, Skyler knows who her Dad is, and has even communicated with him some. We have a pretty decent relationship. Rhyan however does not know her biological father. It is by his choice. I have never hidden her or kept her away from him.
I made the mistake when Rhyan was an infant at letting Mr. Angry be called the “D” word. You know Daddy. She called him that when she was first learning to talk. I didn’t mind because that was what he was to her. Fast forward to the end of our relationship and it wasn’t just me who was hurt by his actions. She lost her daddy that day also.
I started dating who I will call the The Chief 99% of the time, but his first name was Doug. Rhyan couldn’t say it right, and it came out sounding like daddy also. I was not pleased when he encouraged her to call him that. She didn’t know better and I was already annoyed with how his was trying to run my home. I mean come on, yes she was hospitalized right after we first started dating, but don’t show up unannounced while we are in the emergency room. I didn’t let her get close to him. So when I ended things no one was hurt. I was also able to finally correct her to his real name by then also.
I am actually using James’ name here instead of a nickname or something along those lines, and also including his photos. If he ever ask me to stop and put a nickname, or God forbid, we end things, I will change it and remove his photos and add stock photos if need be. I love James, and what he has become to us. But, will I let Rhyan call him the “D” word? It really depend on where we go in my opinion. I will not let it happen any time soon. It just isn’t right. Is he a good role model and do the girls like him? Yes, Rhyan even says she loves him probably as much as I do. It also depends on her biological father, we recently went to court, and I had kinda hoped he would step up and into her life.
Rhyan did call James, Daddy James the other morning to my mother, my mom didn’t correct her but she hasn’t used those words since. If things keep progressing and if her biological father doesn’t step up, then maybe one day if James is comfortable with it, and Rhyan wants to use those terms, then maybe. I understand his point also, but we will see where we go. I am not asking for him to be her or Skyler’s daddy, just a good male role model and for them to see how their mother is supposed to be treated.
Thank you James, for everything you do, and what you have become to us. We love you!